What is domestic abuse?

The North Lincolnshire Community Safety Partnership (NLCSP) has adopted the following government definition:

'Any incident or pattern on incidents of controlling, coercive or threatening behaviour, violence or abuse between those aged 16 or over who are or have been intimate partners or family members regardless of gender or sexuality.  This can encompass, but is not limited to, the following types of abuse:

  • psychological
  • physical
  • sexual
  • financial
  • emotional

'Controlling behaviour is: a range of acts designed to make a person subordinate and/or dependent by isolating them sources of support, exploiting their resources and capacities for personal gain, depriving them of the means needed for independence, resistance and escape and regulating their everyday behaviour.

Coercive behaviour is: an act or a pattern of acts of assault, threats, humiliation and intimidation or other abuse that is used to harm, punish or frighten their victim.'

We also have considered the local needs and prepared a North Lincolnshire Integrated Domestic Abuse Strategy jointly with other agencies for the North Lincolnshire area. 

Coercive control is now an offence - click here to view more information.

Emotional and Psychological abuse 

Emotional and psychological abuse can include constant name calling for example telling someone that you are ugly, stupid or useless; lying to you or to your friends and family about you; persistently putting you down in front of other people; checking up on you, following you, not letting you go out alone; intimidation; blaming; depriving you of sleep. It can also be threats of violence against you, your children or the family pet.  

Physical abuse 

Domestic abuse is the abuse of power and control exerted over another person. Abuse commonly includes pulling hair; punching; hitting; slapping; biting; pinching; pushing; shoving; burning and strangling. 

Sexual abuse 

Rape and sexual abuse is common in abusive relationships.  Sexual abuse can include force, threats or intimidation to engage in sexual activity; force the use of pornography; or force their partners to have sex with other people.   

Financial abuse 

Domestic abuse can include depriving you of money for food and clothes; controlling the finances; making you unreasonably account for money spent/petrol used; exploiting assets; preventing you from working; deliberately running up debts; withholding basic necessities. 

Coercive Control 

From 29 December 2015, coercion and control in a relationship is a criminal offence, carrying a maximum sentence of five years in prison. 

Coercive control describes a range or pattern of behaviours that enable a perpetrator to maintain or regain control of a partner, ex-partner or family member.

 Examples of coercive control might include:  

  • isolating you from your friends and family
  • controlling how much money you have and how you spend it
  • monitoring your activities and your movements
  • repeatedly putting you down, calling you names or telling you that you are worthless
  • threatening to harm or kill you or your child
  • threatening to publish information about you or to report you to the police or the authorities
  • damaging your property or household goods
  • forcing you to take part in criminal activity or child abuse

Some of the behaviours in this list can be other offences as well as coercive control, so your abuser can be arrested for more than one offence for the same behaviour.  For example, if your abuser broke your phone as part of the coercive control then they could be arrested and charged for coercive control and also the offence of criminal damage.

Your abuser will be guilty of the offence of coercive control if

  1. they are personally connected to you, and
  2. their behaviour has had a serious effect on you, and
  3. your abuser knew or ought to have known that their behaviour would have a serious effect on you.

For further information see website.

In an emergency always dial 999.  For Humberside Police in other circumstances call 101.

Support from our local domestic abuse service The Blue Door is available - 0800 197 4787

Rights of Women website (opens new window)

SafeLives website (opens new window) 


The Facts

Stalking and harassment is behaviour that is repeated and unwanted by the victim. The behaviours may seem normal and ordinary, however, when they are repeated they can be menacing and cause alarm and distress to the victim.

 Behaviours include:

  • Frequent unwanted contact such as appearing at the victim’s home, workplace, telephone calls, text messages, letters, notes, e-mails, faxes, or other contact on social networking sites like Facebook, Bebo, My Space etc;
  • Driving past the victim’s home of workplace;
  • Following, watching or loitering near the victim;
  • Sending letters or unwanted ‘gifts’ (‘gifts may appear ‘nice’ but could have a sinister meaning);
  • Damaging significant property belonging to the victim;
  • Burglary or robbery of the victim’s home, workplace, car;
  • Gathering information on the victim by contacting people who know the victim, using public records etc;
  • Harassment of others close to the victim;
  • Threats to harm or kill (includes sexual threats) the victim or those close, particularly those who are seen to be ‘protecting the victim’ or acting as the buffer between the victim and the stalker;
  • Physical and/or sexual assault of victim. 

If you believe you are a victim of stalking visit these useful websites -

Protection Against Stalking

Paladin - National Stalking Advocacy Service  

I want help and I might want to leave......what do I do?